Today was weigh in and I am excited to say I have lost 1.8kg and 3.5cm off my waist which to me is better than the kg's lol.

I have to admit the couple of days with no menus was tough because I hadn't really thought a head and was sort of left with what ever was in the freezer. This weekend is going to be harder, not only because I'm going to have a house full of people for my son's Birthday but staying over too so I know have to really think ahead about what caters for all.

I am enjoying the food and trying to eat most ingredients but there are still I just can't do and yep the excuse is ....ewwwwwww lol. Tomorrow night I'm even going to have cappers in a meal...wish me luck!

So what do I need to do to improve?? Drink more water, drink more water and drink more water. I need to find a water app I think And also using triggers to get me to drink, so like every time I go to the loo have another drink, every time I think of chocolate have a drink, which may mean I never get off the loo because I would be peeing that much. So wish me luck for week 2 and a good result.

The only emotional food I ate today was 2 pieces of chocolate which actually fell in my points for today so really it's not cheating.  Lunch was Chicken Caesar salad for 9 points and was soooo yum.

Dinner was Honey mustard pork with roasted pear salad

Hubby has given his approval for me to make this again lol.  I really enjoyed todays menu although I do hate cooking and my kitchen always looks like a bombs hit it afterwards, but I guess if the food tastes good I'm going to keep coming back for more....well not seconds but keep going with the menu lol.

Still not drinking enough water and I just don't drink a lot in the colder months.  I'm adding fresh lemon and lime juice but most of the time I just forget about it even if it is sitting on the bench in front of me.  So if anyone has any idea's I am all ears.

Today was an emotional day for me.  There are so many pregnancies happening around me at the moment, normally I cope fine but I think that because to me my family isn't complete and it won't be, I feel some days are worse than others.  
See we were always going to have 2 children and although we do, one is an angel in the sky and the other is here on earth and I love him more than life itself he is our miracle boy from 11 IVF transfers not to mention being born at 25 weeks.  I still feel I am missing one more on earth but due to having an incompetent cervix our second one will never happen which is hard especially when you have 8 embrio's on ice.  I still can't bring myself to do anything with our embrio's because to me they are 8 of our babies there and until I accept its over that's where they will stay.  If we did have another one I would most likely have to be on bed rest for the whole pregnancy which is impossible with a near 4 yr old and not fair on him.  I have been told about a new stitch they can do higher up but we still don't know if it would work.  

Don't get me wrong I am so happy for these friends but its still like a knife going into your heart and you feel like you have been left behind. I've even had friends virtually stop talking to me or mentioning their pregnancies because they don't want to hurt me (haven't said but I know it), but what they don't realise it's like your being treated like an infertile all over again and its something you will never just get over. They think the friendship will be fine once they have given birth, but sorry I have a long memory and I don't just 'get over it'.

Well I have survived the first 48 hours on Weight Watchers and have eaten some of the foods I listed in this post Food I don't like and I survived.  One thing that has surprised me is I haven't really craved chocolate, which really surprises me as I ate it everyday and I mean everyday.  I am beginning to wonder if it's because I stuffed myself with so much of it before I started this, that I literally made myself ill, but wondering how long it will last.  I'm hoping the detox happens before the cravings start that way alot of the sugar has gone from the system....keep telling yourself that, keep telling yourself that lol.

One thing I love about Weight Watchers is No food is off limits.  You can eat anything you want. Of course the AMOUNT of food is likely to change, but you get to pick what you eat. You are not forced to eat things you dislike and you are not forbidden anything. It's about MODERATION, not DEPRIVATION! You can chop and change not only your ingredients but also your meals.  You are given rough menu's to follow but its up to you if you want to or in my case need to or you can plan your week out yourself, as long as it falls within your points in my case 26 points a day. Will share more about it soon.

I am looking forward to getting back into smaller clothes and I made sure I took a photo on day one and the measurements to compare. May share a bit later when I feel confident to do so.

Reason to BELIEVE: Because the one person who can turn your dream into a reality is you.

Well today was the last day of stuffing my face with crap.  Tomorrow is a new fresh start, but not just for me it's for my body.  I'm soooooo looking forward to feeling better, having more energy but most of all getting back into my smaller sizes and looking at myself in the mirror without cringing.

The first week to 2 weeks are always the hardest to me.  I go through withdrawls of chocolate, not being able to eat what I want or when I want.  I become cranky, moody and lethargic and not a nice person to be around but once I've almost had a detox for a week, I'm almost a different person.  
My motivation to keep going is watching the numbers on the scales drop.  Of course the first week is always the tease as it seems to be when the biggest numbers come off.  Your told it's fluid, but the funny thing is I have been on a diet and not drink much fluid at all in the first week but still loose....silly me I should of had the fluid maybe I would of dropped more lol.  I get disheartened when I only loose small amounts like 200g etc or none.  You say 200g is g's is a loss and better than nothing....when you've been slogging your guts out that week it's like a kick in the teeth.  My most hated is a plateau or a ga......ga.......gain ok I said it! It only takes one gain and you have the chance of trying to squeeze into the cupboard or fridge to find any chocolate that may have fallen down the back in a crevice.....now come on most of us have been guilty of this!! 

Anyway wish me luck, kick me in the butt what ever you have to do to keep me going.  Would love to hear of anyone else's Blog on their Weight loss journey.

Today I organised myself, shopping done for the start of Weight Watchers next week, signed up again to WW online, menu all planned, bought the September issue of Weight Watchers magazine and all as I need to do is start!

   

I have a problem when it comes to food, I just like basic stuff.  I'm a mash potato and meat girl or pasta and yes love my takeaway although where we live we only rally have pizza or fish and chips so I find every time I head out to the shops away from home, Macca's drive through is normally my port of call.
What I don't like is herbs to me its like eating stuff off the ground outside and also the taste!  Don't like chic peas, beans, olives, Alot of cheeses like blue vein, cottage cheese, ricotta.  Not a large veggie eater but when I do I only really hear peas, corn, carrot and occasionally cauliflower.  Brown rice, pasta infact most brown foods ...ewwwwwwwwwww, honestly the brown rice it like eating hard bits of cardboard and I don't want crunchy rice.  My husband keeps telling me I need to live a little in regards to my taste buds, but my responce is 'this is what I was born with!'
Soooooooooooo come Monday I have decided that I am going to bite the bullet and try what ever the WW menu tells me to eat. Yes I know you can change it around to suit your style but I need it there in writing or I will procrastinate like there is no tomorrow and will either skip the meal, stand in the pantry for 2 hours staring or just grab what ever is easiest which normally is fat food.


DAY 1
Breakfast
Ricotta raisin toast 

Lunch
Corn, chickpea & tuna salad & Brown bread roll

Dinner
Zucchini, feta, tomato 
& rice frittata
Finish with ½ punnet strawberries.
Snacks/Treats
1 Ryvita Multi Grain Crispbread, 
topped with 25g Weight Watchers 
Ham and ½ tomato (sliced).
62g tub NESTLÉ DIET Chocolate 
Mousse. 

So as you can see there are quite a few things in Day 1 that I wouldn't eat....until now....Stay Tuned!!

Do you have one of those mirrors, the one that one day you look skinny and fab, but the next day it's like someone came in and put a whole new mirror in its place and the heavier, dumpier you suddenly appears?? I swear that's been happening most of my life and I'm a little over it. It truly is amazing how one day you can look good in that top but something catches your eye the next time and you think OMG, is that what I looked like last week....ekkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk.


I wish I just had the confidence to accept me for me but I just don't, I don't think I ever will being over weight.  I truly believe it stems back from my days at school. It use to break my heart being teased, called fatty, lard arse, ugly and more.  All as you want to do is be popular or just liked by everyone but you soon realise that its not to be and the worst thing is the age that it all starts, but the funny thing is it doesn't get any better as you get older!  I still remember being in my early 20's out with friends and a guy making a passing comment of 'you have a fat butt'...it's like your school days coming back to haunt you.  Why are people just so nasty, I mean who decided that skinny was in and over weight was out??? 
I just hate the plastic world we are now living in and it scares me to think how far it will go in the future.  Botox here and little bit there and what the hell stick some there too.  Fake boobs, lypo, lifts, tucks when is it ever going to stop, I mean is my son going to marry Barbie!


I wonder if I will ever be content with myself and I wonder if I will just one day stop fighting the battle??