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My weight loss in pictures

Posted by dumpyfrumpy40something on 12:01 AM
My Largest weight 2 yrs ago - 86.5kg




They were a size 16

The lightest I have ever been 66kg
Piling it back on
Currently nearly 79kg
 
I am so angry at myself.  I have always been overweight, from high school to now.  I was teased at school, comments in the street, ignored when out at night in pubs etc the typical things that most over weight people go through.  I'm 5f 1" so I just have a glass of water and it looks like I have gained a stone.  You name it I have been on Jenny Craig, nutri system, weight watcher several times, lite n easy several times, weight loss pills, shake diets, Dr Phil diets, CSRIO diet and I know there are more.  I just fall back into the same traps...my will power has had enough or I start to lose and become to cocky with the first piece of junk food going into the shopping trolley thinking 'yep once is fine', scales don't move so I try it again and before you know it your buying take away and your trolley is over 3/4 junk and full of fat food.


My last effort and the most successful one from the pics above was Weight Watcher points program and even though I had done WW before the points were easier to do as they had changed their menu's to normal food and not celery and carrot sticks.
I hate myself for the weight gain and you know why???  Because the fight to lose 20kg was right up there with one of the hardest things I have done.  Every week was a battle of a 100g loss there a 300g loss there and you were super excited at a 1+ kg loss so it took so long to do and within less than a year all that fat is dumbed at your feet again like it's just returned from holidays.


I loved the way I look, I was confident infact the most confident I think I had ever been, I felt good, I had sooooooooo much more energy which was perfect with a toddler.  I enjoyed shopping....boy did I enjoy shopping  and yep it is true, you are treated differently when your skinnier but most of all my 2 chins disappeared....I had never seen that before.  Its hard to describe but its like the old you has gone and the new one has moved in.  Now I have low self esteem again, hate the way I look, my chin is back, I feel butch and that's probably to do with my short hair at the moment and depressed.  I didn't buy winter clothes because everything this season was clingy and fitting and typical it wasn't when I did loose my weight.  I live in trackies and big tops most days while at home because I don't want to take my big butt out anywhere or I just don't have anything to wear.  I miss dressing up but hey you don't do that in a small town or you get looked at like you have 5 heads.  I'm just a home body again which isn't fair to my 3 year old.
There are some days where I just want to accept me for what I am but if I do that then I am accepting my future poor health including diabetes, setting a poor example for my son, accepting low self estem but more importantly I know I will just put more on and that would send me over the edge.


So I need to do this again for me and me only, saying your doing it for someone else isn't the right step.  You need to be ready for it or it's over within a week.  My motivation is my Weight watchers magazines and unfortunately I stopped buying them at the end of last yr so only have a few to motivate me but will also have my before and after pics happening again I think!



1 Comments


Well miss you have just written a post i could have written. i know wxcatly how you feel. this has been my life from age 13 to now and i know that my weight will be a struggle forever. but honey get back on that rollercoaster with me and everyone else fighting to be the best versions of themselves. do it for you. love you xxxx

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